The Winter Soldier

I have a thing for big rear wheel drive American cars.  Chevy B-bodies to be specific.  The second car I ever owned was a 1986 Caprice that got me through the second half of college.  It was replaced by the Mighty Caprice™, a '94 LT1 powered ex-cop car.  The Mighty Caprice™ has been my faithful steed and winter warrior for the past decade.  Only twice in that time has it left me stranded, and I've only been really stuck in the snow maybe half a dozen times.  But the Mighty Caprice™ is showing it's age.  It's rusted like crazy and it's at the point where it might start getting more expensive to fix than it's worth.  Plus the hassle of having to fix it in the cold if it does break down.  And the radiator exploded.  So I started thinking about what I might want to replace it.

And then I found it.  You see, a major part of the reason I like these cars is because of my lust for the '94-'96 Impala SS.  My ultimate dream car: the Viper.  My "actually may be able to afford one someday" dream car: the Impala SS.  I've lusted after one since I first saw one in 1994.  I never bought one because they always cost too much, and are too nice to use as a utility vehicle and winter transportation like I do the Caprice.  Until now.  I was trolling Craigslist, just browsing cars to see what was out there, and I stumbled across a '95 SS.  It looked beat up in the pics, but it was cheap and the guy assured me that it was rust free and was a genuine SS.

So, I went to look at it.  I knew that if it was what he said it was, it was coming home with me.  And it did.  The sticker in the trunk has the magic WX3 code, so despite the wheels, it is a genuine Impala SS and not a clone.  It's not much to look at, but is mechanically sound and is as rust free as the guy said.  It was the "rust free" part that really sold me on it.  Until I can come up with a better name, and since it will be my cold weather car, I've dubbed it the Winter Soldier™

The guy I got it from had it for 10 years and I'm reasonably certain this was a theft recovery car at some point before that.  It's never been in a major accident, but the title had something to the effect of "transferred to insurance company, claim paid" on it.  The guy also said that the guy he got it from said that the stock wheels were stolen.  Plus, the headrests had TVs in them at one point, and there is wiring left over from a HUGE stereo system(with 0 gauge cable running to the trunk and 12ga speaker wires running all over the car to the now missing speakers).

I know the guy I got it from didn't take all the stereo stuff out.  While he seems to have kept up the car mechanically, he didn't seem to care at all about how it looked.  Even seemingly important things like the steering wheel were overlooked.  The upper hoop is broken off, only the leather cover is holding it together.  The guy said it was like that when he bought it, and the shininess and wear on the broken joints back that up.  The airbag, unpopped, was laying in the trunk.  I know SS steering wheels aren't the cheapest, but really?  The local salvage yard has a Caprice wheel in stock for $35.  And I know the guy wasn't completely inept, the day I stopped over, he was replacing the water pump on a Durango, a job that involves taking most of the front of the engine apart.  And quite frankly, he was a...uh...larger gentleman with poor personal habits(which sounds more PC than Fat Slob).  The interior of the thing was just filthy.  Seriously disgustingly gross.  I don't think it's EVER been cleaned.  I didn't even want to sit in it long enough to drive it home. 

As an added bonus, all the interior plastic panels are covered with one of those cheap ass woodgrain kits.  The woodgrain is super cheap and is falling apart, but the foam tape holding it on seems to be the absolute best foam tape 3M makes.  The stuff just does not come off...

Though some people might think it crazy to use a genuine SS as a winter car, this one will never be nice enough to cause me any concern. The car will be getting a full makeover, starting with the interior by scrubbing, then rescrubbing, and scrubbing again just so I feel comfortable even sitting in it. There are a lot of minor but important mechanical issues to take care of too.  I'm on a tight schedule, because it all has to be done before it starts snowing.   This should be fun...